Sunday, April 17, 2011

Is eyeball touching intimate or invasive?

Someone recently touched my eyeball (both of them in fact) and I think it changed my life.

I went to an optometrist a few weeks ago, as I am slowly getting blinder in one eye (very, very slowly, like, i will be 300 years old at this rate before i am blind) and needed a new contact lens script.

The people were very nice and ran a full test regime on my eyes announcing that my eyes are very healthy but it was time to up the script in my right eye.

At my new lens fitting appointment, I sat in the chair as usual, but unlike any other time, the optometrist asked me to tilt my head back, and before I knew what was happening she had PUT THE LENSES IN MY EYES! That's right, she touched my eyeballs!

I don't like being tapped on the shoulder, let alone anywhere soft and squishy, but it all happened in a couple of seconds, and all was fine, but I couldn't help wondering if this was the first step towards infirmity, and eventually having my "adult diaper" changed by a pleasant, but bored, aged care worker who hasn't been born yet just before she feeds me apple puree.

I once had a barium enema to check for bowel cancer. Look it up. They put a hose up your bum, pump you full of chalky liquid, pump air through the same hose and tell you to hold still for 10-15 minutes whilst they x-ray you.

Somehow this eyeball touching incident has hit me even harder than this, my most humiliating and uncomfortable moment to date.

Also, unfortunately I have hit the age group where men are encouraged to get regular prostate checks. I hope they will be gentle!

It seems that, with increasing age comes increasing indignity. It's probably nearly time to let go of personal pride. I think I see now why old people dress so badly, act like children and do what they want. What's the point in pretending to be self assured, in control and grown up when you have to play "pick an orifice" at your increasingly regular medical appointments?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Rathdowne St,Carlton North,Australia


Anonymous said...

То be born with a silver spoon in one's mouth.

Jimmy said...

Well, thanks Anonymous!
Not sure if this was spam or actually addressed towards me. Anyway, if it was addressed to me, I just wanted to set the record straight. I was born poor white trash in the outer suburbs of Melbourne. I was the first person in my family to finish high school, then go to University, which I paid for myself. No silver spoons or leg ups here.
Sound a little touchy about the topic? I am! I had to work for what I have, and I really hate having that taken away from me with an assumption.
In the words of Forrest Gump "That's all I have to say about that".